They've lived a lot of life, and The Golden Girls are here to provide some pearls of wisdom (with more than a bit of sarcasm and some naiveté). From "Sticks and stones can break your bones. But cement pays homage to tradition," to "Isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad, and still look so good?" to "As they say in St. Olaf: 'Helderbargenflergenflurfennerfen!'," America's four favorite housemates share their hard-earned life lessons.