The Big Book Of Jewish Humor
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Two rival businessmen meet in the Warsaw train station. "Where are you going?" says the first man.
"To Minsk," says the second.
"To Minsk, eh? What a nerve you have! I know you're telling me you're going to Minsk because you want me to think that you're really going to Pinsk. But it so happens that I know you really are going to Minsk. So why are you lying to me?"
Four men are walking in the desert.
The German says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have a beer."
The Italian says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have wine."
The Mexican says, "I'm tired and thirsty.
I must have tequila."
The Jew says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have diabetes."